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Thursday, Oct. 09, 2003 - 10:36 p.m.

Because I visit this site often, I’ve been watching my referrer log carefully ever since I set up a stats tracker thing a few days ago. I am proud to announce my First Ever search string hit – that is, the first time my site has come up as a search result. The string was “spiders living in sc”.


Next item. Yes, I write about my cat all the damn time. I can’t help it; not only is she my only roommate, but she’s a roommate who I can make fun of online all the time, because she can’t read. And this is only sort of related to her:

One of Ronnie’s toys is a creepy gray furry mouse thing named Federico Ferret (no, I don’t name her toys; that’s what the package said). Federico has been subjected to systematic maulings since his purchase, and has recently not been looking so well. Well, I came home today, and Federico’s furry exterior has been nearly torn off, revealing a black plastic core. It is an extremely phallic black plastic core, with the fur exterior now inside-out and hanging off one end. Federico looks like a black dildo wearing a fur-lined cape. He is flying around the apartment at this moment.

The Week of Evil has ended. Over the past few days I met with all fifty of my students, one at a time. Most of the individual conferences went fine. One girl would not leave; every time I’d start to make those it’s-time-for-you-to-go comments, saying things like “Well, you seem to be doing fine! Enjoy your Fall Break!”, she would settle into her chair and blink. I’d then have to politely ask some inane question about her major, and the whole process would be repeated.

The strangest thing about conferences is that students invariably dress up for them. Since most freshman English teachers at our school require conferences around midterms, the halls of my office building this week were thick with cologne and miniskirts. I really don’t understand it. I can understand that maybe my football players are trying to be extra-charming at this crucial time (though cologne, without exception, only serves to make me point and snicker), and that maybe some of the girls might find me attractive or think I find them attractive (though I am extra-professional in this regard, if not in others). But almost all of them dress up, and they do it for all their teachers. People tend to dress up more in SC in general, so that’s part of it. But the revealing clothes unsettle me. One of my friends last year had a student show up to a conference wearing go-go boots, a really short skirt, and pink underpants. Her demeanor wasn’t the least bit flirtatious – she just sat in his office with her underpants and asked him questions about her paper. I’ve had similar experiences, though nothing so difficult.

I think people should wear whatever they want, in class and elsewhere. And I think women shouldn’t be chastised or judged in any way for wearing revealing clothing. But it is not easy to have a conference with someone when you can see her underpants. I guess this is the whole idea behind business attire.

Let’s end this with the now-traditional Ice-Skating With Warrant: The Next Four Days. I’m glad you’re enjoying this, Bettina!

January 9

Dear Diary –

We went ice skating again today. Jered came with us but Russell abandoned him. I’m getting better. Matt S. was there + he goes: “Hey it’s Eva Moore. She wants to talk to me.” Yea right. He was a fuckin good skater, though. He’s kind of hot. I’m babysitting Jered + Russell but Russell is fast asleep.

I was supposed to do that fish tank cleaning today, but I don’t want to.


They played Slaughter at the rink whereas yesterday they played gospel.

Peace, Veggie

[Matt S. was a popular older kid from my school. In later years, he ended up at the same alternative high school as I did, still popular. It was rumored that he beat his girlfriend regularly. A few years after high school, I heard he’d come out. Actually, a whole bunch of the popular boys from high school turned out to be gay.]

January 10

Dear Diary –

The guitarist from Def Leppard is dead! They played Def Leppard at the rink today. I skated much better.

I think me, Jessica, Debbie, + someone else could be ZZ Top for Halloween.

Jered’s babysitter Delia is weird. She goes: “Hello Senorita. You are very pretty.” in a Spanish accent. I said Thank You + wished 4 someone to roll my eyes at.

Skating was fun. There was this hot guy w/ a Metallica shirt and jacket + sunglasses. He was good at skating.

Peace, Veggie

[Yes, I now know that ZZ Top only had three members]

January 11

♥ Warrant WARRANT!

Dear Diary –

Hey! Erik Turner + Joey Allen from Warrant were on KBPI at 4:30. In 10 minutes, at 7:30, Warrant goes onstage! I would give anything (except going out w/ Matt C.) to go to that concert. I love Warrant more than I can even say! They are so wonderful. I wish I was there so much. Warrant is my life. I would die for them.



Peace + ♥, Veggie

[Additional statements of “♥ Warrant ♥” adorn this page]

January 12

Dear Diary –

Last night I cried myself to sleep. That concert meant so much to me! I love Warrant so much. Thinking about all those people partying down there made me so sad. Warrant is my life. They are the best band in the whole world!

I lost my Warrant – Cherry Pie tape cover! That has the best picture of Jani in it. What if everyone in Hawaii listens to the New Kids? I guess I’ll have to help them see the light. I’m taking all my tapes, but my radio would probably mildew! Bryn has her hair shaved on one side!

Peace + ♥, Veggie

One final note: my correspondence skills have been Triple-Strength-Extra-Shitty lately. They will get better. I still love you, Russell…but my calling card’s out of minutes. And thanks a lot for ruining my life. I guess you owed me one.

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