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Brent
Bettina
Liz
Kerry
Isaac
Johnny

Monday, Apr. 11, 2005 - 10:39 p.m.

Thank you, Isaac and Russell, for introducing me to Achewood. This is some Emily Dickinson shit right here:

I want to just make like a big life size origami of myself and be all HOW ARE YOU
HOW HAVE YOU BEEN
Just push on its nose with my open palm and watch as like one of its arms falls off.

I have just finished painting the dining room. It is lovely. Two days ago it had blue and purple and green striped wallpaper above the chair rail and maroon paint below, plus a giant gold Chandelier of Doom. Now it's cream* above the chair rail and darkish olive green below. Tomorrow the chandelier will be ceremonially removed.

* Interactive Cream, to be precise. Worst paint color name ever?

Right now, though, there is High Life and aching hamstrings (one bends over a lot painting) and a lovely, lovely night alone on the back porch with my laptop. L is gone for a few days. Happiness continues. Nothing's different except me, but boy am I right in the head these days. Last week I wrote Mary a long letter and emailed her mom to get her address, so I'm even pulling my head above the solitude. It's all very good.

I've been lifting weights for the first time in five years, and I'm staggered by how quickly the human body can change. Two weeks in and I have a curving bicep, a notched gap between my trapezius and the top of my shoulder, less of that boylike lower back fat I tend to carry, more cleavage, and better balance. I always love healthy food, but for the first time I crave it -- I want nothing but lettuce and pears and chicken breasts, and I am having a love affair with prunes. Prunes! Prunes are the best food ever.

So, things are good, and I am an old lady. There is guilt, as there always is, but I'm keeping it in check. Because there are better things. There is a Pixies cover band made up of the drummer from my real band plus two wonderful guitarists from other local bands -- we have had two practices and seven songs already, all shiny and tight already and silly silly silly. It's so good to play with no creative pressures, just mechanical and emotional ones. And it's so good to play with someone else. We have a show at the end of May.

And there is the garden, or rather gardens -- L has flowers and herbs and vegetables tucked away in every corner of the yard: tomatoes, okra, cucumbers, Japanese eggplant, basil, poppies, bronze fennel, and much more. I watered everything this evening. I am so excited.

So that's that.

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