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Sunday, Jul. 31, 2005 - 5:24 p.m.

I picked the wrong day to sort through all my old personal papers and flyers and journals and stickers and letters and whatnot. Reason #1: It's the first day of my period. Reason #2: We played a great show last night, and I stayed up way too late and slept past noon for the first time in years. Reason #3: I haven't been hungry, so I haven't eaten much today, and I drank too much coffee. Reason #4: It's gray and rainy out. So I'm highly susceptible to emotional overload, and nothing is guaranteed to bring that on like looking at pictures from high school and reading old postcards. All the beautiful people I've known, every psychological drama, every rock show, and all the longing looks I've ever thought about too's all swimming around the floor of the guest room. It's too much.

But damn, I miss you all.

Last night was so fun. Covering songs that people love makes for cheap fame -- a club full of smiling people (not just hipsters, either) singing along and shaking my hand afterwards, inviting me to parties, asking if they can take the set list home, grinning all the way out to their cars. Girls and boys were equally effusive, which is rare. It's heady. I can't imagine what it's like to get that kind of response to one's own songs.

And I'm in love with my band because we all feel that same exhilaration together. I have a giant crush on them. I want to take them to work with me and put them under my pillow at night.

So between them and the notes I wrote but never slid under dorm room doors, I am rather overwhelmed.

Look what's in my newspaper box:


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